Coping With Grief: What’s Normal & When to Get Support

Grief after losing someone can feel overwhelming, disorienting, and unpredictable. There is no “right” way to grieve and no fixed timeline. Here’s what’s normal, what can help, and when grief may need extra support.

What grief can feel like

• Waves of sadness, longing, or anger
• Guilt or “what if” thoughts
• Numbness or disbelief
• Trouble sleeping, eating, or concentrating
• Physical exhaustion
• Moments of relief or even laughter — which are normal too

The American Psychological Association notes that grief is a natural response to loss and that, for most people, the intensity of grief lessens over time.

Ways to cope

• Let yourself feel it — grief isn’t something to “get over” quickly.
• Keep basic routines: sleep, meals, movement.
• Talk about the person you lost with people who knew them.
• Accept practical help from others.
• Expect hard days around anniversaries and holidays, and plan for them.
• Find ways to remember: a ritual, a letter, a photo album.

When grief needs extra support

For a small proportion of people, intense grief persists and interferes with daily life. The American Psychiatric Association describes prolonged grief disorder, which involves intense longing for or preoccupation with the person who died, along with symptoms like emotional numbness, feeling that life is meaningless, or intense emotional pain, persisting long after the loss and causing problems in daily functioning. Grief can also overlap with depression. If you’re struggling to function, or you’re thinking about harming yourself, reach out — call or text 988.

Therapy can offer a steady space to process loss. Online sessions can be easier when grief makes it hard to leave home.

Frequently asked questions

Keep reading: our online therapy guide compares costs, formats and the main services.

Sources

• American Psychological Association: Grief
• American Psychiatric Association: Prolonged Grief Disorder
• NIMH: Depression
• SAMHSA: 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline